ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Randomize
