man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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