You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
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