They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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