I am puke
guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
