am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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