Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
