I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Randomize
