On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Randomize
