Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
