I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
