took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
He better not be in your backpack
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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