R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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