i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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