btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Randomize
