so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
