i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Randomize
