went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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