You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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