I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Randomize
