If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize