i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
