Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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