Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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