god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
