For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
