Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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