That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
