Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize