but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Randomize
