i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Randomize
