If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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