I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
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