Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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