Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
