I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
