she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
you never un-have a 4some
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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