Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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