I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
How's work?
Spinning.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
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