yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
