you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Randomize
