my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
honey bunches of taint.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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