She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
