just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
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