so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
