How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
God, I missed his penis.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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