So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
