Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
