DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
My dick has a subreddit
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
