Who did Billy Mays play for?
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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