am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
