I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
