check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Randomize
